June Bugs and Love Bugs

I hate June Bugs and I hate Love Bugs.  I'm just throwing that out there.  Neither of them sting or bite or do anything much that's objectionable.  OK.  Wait.  In point of fact, the June bug grubs do feed on tender roots so newly planted ornamentals can be negatively impacted but there are pretty much always things in the dirt that eat things I would prefer they didn't so I don't consider that much of an issue.  I might if I was a farmer but as it is it's no big deal.

What I hate most about June bugs is that they all flunked flying school so they bounce into things, like me or the door or the windows or the floor or the dog or whatever.  Then they have so little control over their own bodies that they get tangled in my hair and can't figure a way to get loose.  And I have very short hair.  It makes my skin crawl.

June bugs, also called May Bugs and June Beetles are a new world version of the scarab beetle so well known from Egyptian records and Hollywood films.  They lay eggs in the summer and the grubs spend the winter underground.  Skunks and moles are said to eat the grubs which slightly elevates both noxious rodents in my opinion.

Love bugs have completely different issues.  The fact that the male and females fly around for days after they have coupled is creepy enough.  I don't really mind them crawling on me but they swarm at the doors and windows and decorate any vehicle that moves.  As their little bodies decay they become very acid and can etch the paint on your car.  Well, they don't really do that anymore since car paints have become so much stronger and impenetrable but they used to.  They still decorate car bumpers, grills and fenders and are hard to remove.

Love Bugs, also called Honeymoon Fly, Kissing Bug and Double Headed Bug, are all the worse for having two flights per year.  It's bad enough we have to endure them in the late spring but they come back out in the late summer.  Like now.  Again.

I just reread this rant about bugs and I must point out that I understand this is all of no importance whatsoever compared to fighting cancer or terroristic threats or car bombs or global warming or the current political craziness.  And I understand that both the June bugs and the Love bugs must have some sort of positive role in ecology or they would be long gone now.  But really.  Damn.  Can't the stupid bugs just go away?  Where is that first cold front that will change everything including my happiness level?